… How many of these resonate with you?
In no particular order….
- How a woman/her partner is made to feel when she mentions to friends, family or colleagues that she is going to give hypnobirthing a whirl.
Comments like ‘yeah, I wanted to have a ‘natural’ birth – but you will be screaming for an epidural, trust me’ or, (eyes rolling) ‘Sounds a bit weird and hippy-ish to me, I really can’t see that working’ or ‘Good luck with that – here’s my birth story’ (queue negative birth story in all its detail).
- Yep, we know birth is unpredictable .
- Yes, despite this, we would still like to do all we can to stay calm, whatever turn our birth takes.
- Yes, we’re going to give it our absolute best shot – but if I feel I want any other help I will make that decision then, with a clear head and with knowledge. After all, if I don’t know my options I don’t have any, right? So I choose to educate myself and be at peace with my decisions – whatever they end up being on the day.
- Stop right there! I’d LOVE to hear your birth story once I’ve had my baby. But until then, unless it’s super positive, I would rather not hear it – thank you!
- Women being told that feeling pain in labour is wrong and if you feel pain when hypnobirthing you’ve not practised enough, or you’re doing it wrong.
- Rubbish! Whilst some women may not feel any pain at all, it is OK and generally normal to feel very strong and intense sensations during labour.
- In fact, these feelings encourage a woman to move or switch positions, which in turn helps her baby into the world.
- It’s not the pain as such, it’s how the woman responds to it, and in my experience (including my own personal experience), it’s all about not being frightened by the intensity of labour and turning yourself over to your very-capable-and-bloody amazing body.
- It’s all about understanding what’s going on inside your body, and how and why it’s positive to trust your body, so you can literally let go.
- The notion that if you’ve had a caesarean birth or an epidural or any other intervention, that you have failed, or hypnobirthing was all a waste.
- The beauty of hypnobirthing is that you get a set of tools and techniques which will serve you no matter what turn your birth takes.
- You will remain calm and in control the whole time, regardless of how you give birth.
- Any decisions you need to make will be made with a clear head, and not from a place of panic.
- Your decisions will be informed choices as you will know what questions to ask so you have a clear understanding of what is being offered, and why.
- This ensures you get the full picture and that you are not making a decision based on fear.
- All the above goes a long way to feeling at peace how things went.
- That you must only breathe the baby down. NO pushing.
- Firstly, I want to say that this is a wonderful and positive counter image to what we have been fed all our lives about how women give birth. And that I agree that pushing hard against your body (in the absence of a medical emergency) is wrong.
- I also want to say that it is OK to bear down and push too, if this is what your body is telling you to do. Remember, your body knows what it should do.
- But, in the absence of a medical emergency, just keep an eye on the aptly named ‘purple pushing’ and the position you choose to adopt for this stage. Being flat on your back and doing coached pushing (chin to chest, hold your breath and PUSH!) is not only incredibly disempowering, but also may increase the chance of tearing.
So these are my 4 top irks currently. They may be added to or change in the future!
What are yours?